A Poem by Ayesha Mushtaq

Ayesha Mushtaq is currently living in Canada where she teaches in a university.  She is an enthusiastic teacher and a creative artist.  Her poetry demonstrates modern sensibility. Here is a poem by Ayesha with symbolic literary references and some powerful sonorous and pictorial images.  The poem focuses on the inner conflict and reminds us of Prufrock of TS Eliot. To fully appreciate this poem one needs to have a basic awareness of some major literary works in English as the poem makes use of literary allusions.

Hebe…..me and qualms—a goodbye for good!

By

Ayesha Mushtaq

Qualms of conscience! Halt! Rest awhile!

And let me drench in thoughts-anagrammed evil! vile ! whatever.

I am not a sinner, And I have not sinned

So stop pinching me tonight and rest awhile!

Oh Conscience!

You hiss like a snake,

And pinch like a thorn

By you I am falsely accused!!

You sentence Tess to be evil

And Iago saintly born!!

You anger me my anima

SO GO!!!

Take a walk out tonight!

And next time round,

You’d better have your homework done right.

Vole,Olve,Veol or Leov

It stinks no matter what you call it,

A cabbage skunk stays a cabbage skunk

Huh? You dare smirk conscience?

Ah! Don’t be absurd! I am not punch drunk.

Tonight I am saner than I ever was,

Sobriety embraces me like a fraternity

And I find joy in my weakest fragility

Love is insane indeed,

Expectations are illusive

But my life is mine tonight

And I’m divinely ecstatic!!

Let me go and meet him tonight

He is coming to make his visit,

He has braved the passage of

Those rich and beautiful women,

Who come and go,

Talking of Micheal Angelou

So qualms!

Go out tonight,

And let him come and make his visit

Go tame Minerva instead!

She needs a firmer hand!!

And let my Prufrock be daunting and upright tonight.

Oh! A minute conscience before you go,

I have a confession to make

You have been my dearest friend

And for leaving me tonight

I promise I will make amends!

His feelings are a seasonal affair , you know,

Of love and illusions filled,

He has incapacitated himself,I know,

But damnit

He has ruined me too, you know?

Poor chap!look here he comes

So mundane and simple like

Hush now qualms! Go and leave us alone.

I have prepared my little speech

To feed to his little mind.

You hug me conscience?

When I abhor you so?

Go conscience and here catch morality too,

Take my politeness and good nature too

 Here, broken promises and truth denied

Take them away from me tonight.

Go! Leave! I beseech you

Take your ethics and Sunday prayers too

And goodwill and humanity?

Throw those in the bin as you go!!

I have business here tonight,

In the chambers of my mind

Yes bookish and arrogant mind,

No, he won’t want coffee spoons tonight, no worry

I have enough hemlock,

For us both

To laugh, drink and be merry.